Why Are Relationships Ending?

Not all relationships last a lifetime. Some fulfill a cycle in our life and, when it ends, it only remains to get a good learning and move on.

There are many reasons why relationships end. We generally think of the most negative ones, such as infidelity, lack of respect, a physical fight, psychological abuse … However, these are not the only reasons that exist. Many times people decide to cut their bond because they appreciate and respect each other, but they simply no longer share any common points of weight. For this reason, they prefer to let go, to cut their losses, in order to give themselves the opportunity to build other, more meaningful links.

Next we will reflect a little more on this topic, starting from the principle that couple relationships are an important part of everyone’s life and that today it has become very important to distinguish between those that are positive or beneficial, from those that are negative or harmful.

We all change, as do our relationships

If at age 30 we look back, when we were 15-18 years old, we may notice several differences regarding how we were, what we believed, what we needed, what drove us, what our relationships were like, what we chose to keep and what we did not , who we preferred and who we didn’t, etc. This is normal, because at each stage of life we ​​have the opportunity to grow and develop different forms of interaction.

It is possible that we also notice that many relationships that at the time contributed a lot to us we no longer keep, and not necessarily because of something unpleasant, but simply because our life took another course and did not coincide more with the path of the people with whom we related. 

The psychologist Raquel Aldana affirms that relationships expire: “in any case,  relationships are stages and, as stages, they change. If you accept the rules of the game you will be able to advance, if you don’t you will stagnate ”.

Just as relationships can always be started, they can also be ended, for many reasons. There are numerous factors that can cause the breakdown of something that we once thought “indissoluble” or “for life.” However, these factors are not always negative.

There are many relationships that end because what united them in the beginning has ceased to exist. For example, there are good language classmates who, once the course ends, no longer have contact. Each one makes his life and moves on, leaving behind only the memory of a good companionship.

Also keep in mind that what many people understand by “the end” of a relationship may actually simply be a change. For example, there are friends who shared often in college, but after graduation, adopting new rhythms of life, they cannot share as much. However, when they have the opportunity to do so, they feel comfortable, with that pleasant feeling that everything is “as usual”, even if everything is different around it.

Not everything that starts well ends well

Unlike what the title of a famous fairy tale says, not everything that begins well ends well. Many times, issues occur throughout the relationship (friendship, partner, work, etc.) that make us put an end to it. Infidelities, disrespect, mistreatment (physical or psychological), lies, etc.

When relationships end for any of the above causes, it is for the best, even if it hurts at first. It is useless to tie yourself to a relationship that is only going to generate discomfort and open wounds over and over again.

As it is not always possible to have total certainty about the direction a relationship is going to take, it is important to maintain an open attitude that, just as something can start, work and stay (for a long time), other things can begin and end. sooner rather than later because they are simply not for us, and that we can learn, grow and improve from everything.

After all, learning is part of sharing and letting a person be a part of our life.

In short, beyond the cause and how the general experience in the relationship has been, we must bear in mind that each relationship, good or bad, is an opportunity to grow, be better people and build other bonds, in a more deep and positive.